Go BIG or Go Home!

So with Tony & Ginky’s video interview up on Go4Pool.Net recently, it made me watch my own interview again.  I hadn’t seen it in probably a year & I was quite surprised by a couple of my answers.

One question asked was something about my goals in pool …. I answered,

<"I’d like to maybe qualify for maybe just one WPBA event someday hopefully …."> 

Wow, geez Gail, don’t overdo it!  Try to reign in on the fantasy land there!! Fo’ real!

I mean I was quite surprised by how small my dreams were.  Confidence has never been an issue for me in other areas of my life, but pool — seems different.  I find that I’m proud of myself just for playing well, executing a locked up safe, winning a match against a "B" player, maybe an "A" every blue moon.  But I don’t BELIEVE in the possibilities in my game’s future. 

Perhaps a disenchantment with the lucrative possibilities deter my fantasy concoctions?

Or maybe the lucky garbage surrounding the game’s biggest outlet, 9-ball, keeps me from wanting to go further?

Maybe it’s the lack of time I have to devote so I condemn myself to settling for a small goal, small results type outlook. 

I don’t’ know.  I’m no psychologist.  I’m just spewing my ramblings. 

The worst would be that I don’t think I have any talent at all. 

<Just typing that scared me…..>

We have to learn to be our own best friends because we fall too easily into the trap of being our own worst enemies.    ~Roderick Thorp

So this past weekend, I drew Noel, an "A" player.  And I say to Finnegan, "well, at least I’ll get a bye the next round."  He looked at the chart & didn’t see what I was talking about … I point to the bye on the one loss side and he says, "why are you doing that?!?!  You can beat Noel if you give it your all!  Don’t already think you’ve lost!" 

I half listened to Fin, as I chalked it up to a "trying to pump me up with idol fluff" pep talk and half-heartedly played Noel.  A donut later, I report it to Fin & he says, "Wow, Noel must have played good!"  Really?  Why did Fin say that?  I mean, Noel did play good, but why did it surprise Fin that I didn’t win a rack? 

I actually really respect Fin’s opinion on players … he’s been watching, playing & running the game for decades so he’s seen it all.  Then I realized, Fin was serious.  He really believed I had a chance to beat Noel & was surprised that I didn’t give him more of a challenge….  WTF? Really? 

Why does he believe in me more than I believe in myself?

It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not.     ~ Unknown

wtf Then Sunday’s playoffs came.

Amsterdam Team 9-Ball BCA Playoffs 

Woah — WTF? (yes, that’s my Team name) was on one broke down lookin leg.  Tom & I had to double up for the first round of Sunday as everyone was MIA.  Tom & I played Jam UP — I played two people I used to be terrified of and now, I felt like, "I don’t give a damn who you are!" 

Why the change of attitude?  Why the spontaneous confidence? Why the fight?

I don’t know.  I just went in there & played.  Simple. 

So when I watched the Go4Pool.Net video after this past weekend’s roller coaster in confidence, it all of a sudden clicked.  I’m in control my own destiny & often I hinder my own ability to put my best game out there simply by playing the percentage ranking game. i.e. I’m a C+ & he’s an A, so he’ll probably win!"  

Silly Rabbit.

simpsons_donutsl120I think every pool player goes through this transition from fearing certain people to one day seeing them as an equal.  When I first started playing, I was petrified of playing a D+ — then it became the B players I was scared of … I think my time on the Predator Tour has helped to cure my fear of most players (except maybe Monica Webbs …. YIKES!!)  lol 

I’ve given Opens a run for their money, beatin A’s & B’s … and when I did, I wasn’t differentiating between my ranking & theirs, I simply played hard & fearlessly, period. 

Whether it’s because I’m getting older, or experience or becuase I’m just plain tired of being afraid, the "confident fighter" feeling seems to be coming around more & more — and it feels GOOD!   

For the record….the Predator Tour video on Go4Pool.net is actually my favorite.  When Finnegan, in his oh so Italian, but really he’s Irish voice says, "I’m not used to listening to a woman talk about pool!"  It’s priceless to me!  LOL

And if you didn’t click on the little bulldog at the top of this post, you totally should.  Any forum member or chat room attendee will totally appreciate how spot on the website pins some of the "characters" that we find in these media outlets of our pool community!! 

Some of my favs! 

fanboy

ego

tirelessrebutter

cybersisters

godzilla

 Go Ahead & Click on Them!

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~ by g2 on September 17, 2009.

One Response to “Go BIG or Go Home!”

  1. […] I decided to go back and read some of my old ones.  I read a post I wrote a while back called "Go Big or Go Home"  It made me think about a lot of my conversations with Tony and Emily in Vegas this year, both […]

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